For the LOVE!

You guys. I get to be part of one of the coolest clubs ever....along with 499 new friends of mine. This news has me feeling like this:

 But first, let me back up a bit.

When I first started blogging (not even a year ago), it was because I had something to say about motherhood - being a NEW mom and all the things that basically blindsided me when I stepped into this new life. Also, at the time of my pregnancy and the birth of my daughter, only one of my close friends was already a mom. I didn't have a mom community to fall into where I could ask all my illogical questions, get sound advice, or just unload my overwhelmed feelings (and have them validated). Writing about my experiences and feelings actually gave me the affirmation I craved and - bonus - provided an opportunity to encourage other first time moms finding their way. 
 
Then something unexpected happened. The more I typed, the more I uncovered my passion for words and writing. A passion that was first planted in childhood, but had long sat dormant and unused. 

Growing up, I was the kid who was more excited about a trip to Barnes & Noble than the toy store. #whatafreak

And now? Well, not much has changed. 

Recently I read this post, On Becoming a Writer by Jen Hatmaker, and all through the intro I kept thinking yep, yep. Totally me. Mmhmm. If you didn't click the link, she basically says "writers write." It was the push I needed to decide I'm all in. 

both hands.

My 13 month old has just started walking. Parents, you know how it happens. Those first unsure, wobbly steps VERY QUICKLY turn into a tiny human toddling confidently all over the house. I think it only took Aven between one to two weeks to get really good at it. She beams with pride and even applauds herself over this new milestone. It's adorable. But in the beginning when she was first learning, she would reach up and grab one of my hands. Then she would stand there paralyzed, reeeacching up until she could grab hold of my other hand - only then would she feel brave and secure enough to lift her foot and make a move. It took both hands. I had to be all there.

This really made me think about how often I parent with one hand.

In a literal sense, it's totally a survival skill for parents, especially in the beginning when you're holding your child in one arm while functioning with the other. It's kind of astounding what you can accomplish with one less limb out of necessity. But more importantly, how many times do I parent with one hand, in an absentminded or passive way? Giving my daughter only part of me? I know for a fact that 100% of Aven's mama does not always show up. Often purely out of distraction with other things. Or sheer exhaustion from LIFE RAISING A BABY. (HOW do people have more than one child?? I need a nap just thinking about it.)